One of the things noted to be a major issue for our well-being is emotional avoidance.
It may seem to make sense to avoid things that are uncomfortable or unpleasant. And when it comes to feelings many of us have heard messages growing up that sounded a little like “stop crying” or “you’ve got nothing to worry about”. These messages only serve to encourage the avoidance. And most of us are aware of the momentary relief we can experience that avoidance can provide. For example – you know what feels uncomfortable – public speaking, and if I don’t speak instant reduction in those uncomfortable feelings!
Long term, however, this can lead to magnifying the problem – the uncomfortable, scary stuff seems bigger and therefore should be further avoided – and we diminish our belief in our ability to manage that which is uncomfortable. And important to note is the
So, what if I told you there was a reasonably simple solution to this. Please note I said simple not easy. According to Joan Rosenberg there are three steps or parts to this.
3. – One choice
Disappointment
Frustration
distract from.
Feelings are temporary! These sensations come like a wave, having a peak and then subside. So we can ride this wave! You could picture this like when you walk along the shore of the beach and a wave comes up the shore and can linger, or hang, and then subside.They always subside!
- Stay present
- Surf the wave
- Let them subside
- You will feel centred and capable
Insights will follow and with practice you can unhook for old stories and follow the path back to being more fully you!
Cheryl Gale,
Pscyhologist,
Proactive Health & Movement
